Wednesday, August 20, 2008

sch has been rather boring.
anyway,
asked sarah if it was her situation
what would she do?
she told me
"friends should accept each other for who they are,
change isnt that simple,
if you cant accept it,
thn leave it."
whats with expectations?
i seriously dk
what you expect from me
do you expect
me to change 360 degrees
in a matter of time.
i cant say i dont have bad points.
i know i have many.
you say i insensitive to ppl
feelings,when i moodswing.
but seriously,
who doesnt,you dare say you nvr?
maybe to you,
i seem to be forcing them
to do what i want.
but do you ever
think i'd be so serious.
to risk a friendship,
just becos i want ppl to do what i want?
if you did,
you prob dont know me.
i seriously dk,
if i'm the prob.
sec 2 that time
also like that,
its not i making a big fuss.
but these type of thing also not first time.
maybe we just cant
live together.
maybe i didnt realise.
but since when i expect you
ppl to make time for me
arent you alil too selfish.
i only'd asked on rare occasions.
how many times have i?
do you wanna count?
i'd have other commitments
and its not becos i didnt want to.
i cant stay out so late
and you know that.
i got curfew.
i dw to go and leave just like tht.
you think i nvr tried asking.
if cant,
thn the most
is i beg,but in the end
bobian what can i do also?
i also give up what.
if i dont blame me,
who do i blame?
you?her?other ppl?
becos when things seem to be
my fault,
i blame myself.
is there anything wrong with that?
and i alrdy tried
not to make her torn apart alrdy.
i did tried my best,you know?

bottomline:i dont want to feel feel like
"shit,i cant do this,cant do that."
mr faizal told me
at the end,we're just living for ourseleves.
whos going to be with you,
when you're 60 and dying?

seriosuly do you think
you were sensitive to ppl feelings too?
i seriously
dont care
if what i say is gg to make
the whole world hate
or even you to hate me.
or even cost my friendships.
i just need to express
how i feel.

seeing you super happy,
every laughter and smile
i see.
the more i know
perhaps i made the right decision.
if you think i that happy,
i tell you i'm not.
but now,
i guess i wont regret.

i dont expect you to get all emo
without me
but the laughter i hear
smiles i see.
i just know you'll live well
anyway,bright side:
you wouldnt feel torn apart ever.
and this arint the first time.
i guess problem was,is,will be meand smile even more without me

(6:28 PM)