Monday, September 29, 2008
the newer more bhb vivian:DDDD
joellelyn ,this is for you!:Dalikeness.even though its sad to know,but its true i WAS like you.hahahaa
joellelyn ,this is for you!:Dalikeness.even though its sad to know,but its true i WAS like you.hahahaa
okay you all can laugh,
i changed okay!
it was meant to be a laugh also.
i nvr post alot other unglam even worst,
hahahaa
i was laugihng my ass off,
when i saw all these pics.
ohman,gott too many.
lazy upload.
so paiseh.
hahahahaahah!
i realsie i lvoe doign twist in my pics last time,
and thot it was cute-.-
unbelievable to the max.
pukepuke.
tml sure go sch kenna laughed at.
Sunday, September 28, 2008
i'm still alive today.
lookingback,i've been living for 15 years
on this cool planet.
perhaps,i've been wasting my life away.
it seems ironic/weird,
but somehow i just felt like crying.
well,
life hasnt been wonderful in the past.
but now,
ima a really happy kid:D
daddy/mummy/brother loves me.
and i love them.
they treat me like princess.
friends,
i love them like crazy too.
even though dk if they do.
faced with setbacks.
august had been a really lousy month.
but i'd learnt many lessons.
seen faults i've never seen in me,
but through the help of ppl.
i seen.
i hope in time to come,
i will have a happy family/friends.
and my love for my dearest heavenly papa.
will never end.but grow more.
angshaojun:i've known you for 3 years.i love you alot,
because i know you treat me very nice.i know i've not always been
treating you very nice,irritating you,bullying you.casting you aside at times.for that,i'm really sorry.i'll never forget you and the laughters gossiping you shared with me,i can say now for sure.you're the person
i'd always look forward to go out with and play.over these years,you've changed alot,look so pretty now.someone i'd want to talk to about lame things.cause i dont think you'll never mind my lameness.someone there to cheer me up,wit hyour spasticness.i treasure you,my twinnie<3even if we leave/drift away one day.i will never forget you,someone in sec school that is worth me remembering.and dont ever feel tornapart or what,
because when you are alone,i'll always be there for you.I<3you.i wish to take so many pictures with you,at leats when old i wont eveer forget you and i can remmemeber the times
agus:you are a nice person,suaning you is best.sorry i call you fat&short.
but now that you suaning me,i understand.and its irritating.
amandaclarepeter:known you for since when i was in pri school,
go camps/holidays together,you are cool okay!:DDeat your lunch luh.love<3
brendalimjiayi:i'm not say very close to you,but you've been the coolest thinker i've known.run so fast,so cool.makes me jealous with your big eyes:Dsmile always alright?love yea.
brennatanbaina:we've known each other this year,before i know you,
i thought you very coolcool one,but now.
i think you're jsut as lame as me:DDDjokinjoking,you're sitll as cool and crazy.
charmainelaizixian:my gaybestie,if i were to think from last year.think i've been very mean/neglected you.probably when you're sad,seem no tto care for you.i'm sorry.for all the letters/swans you've gave me.thank you so much,i appreciate alot.i look at them and smile when i read.we drifted alot,but its really ookay one.because i have fond memories of you,when we take pictures once in a bluemoon.irritating/suaning you last year.must work hard for exams okay,sad find someone to talk to,dont keep things to yourself.dont so low self-esteem,you can do it one,friends do come and go,but whats most important is you once have such beautiful memories with them.its only like this,you appreciate relationships.I<3 you.happy advanced gaybestie day.go take photo with me okay,its not a request but a demand:D
clarissalimstrawnana:known you since primary school.choir with you were awesome/fun becaus esuaning irritating you is so fun.you so nice to bully,me love you:D
clementtanbotak:known you for 2 years,now no more hair.i miss seeing you,tallie.always cool in my eyes,plays cool guitar.faster finish your 2 years.faster come back.you're always be a cool brother:]
crystal:its great to see you on sundays,even though i dont talk to you much.but thats cause i dont know how.i very dumb one.you very cool eh,loveyou
dilliontanhongbin:you are a cool person,with cool hair.not say super close to you.but nice to seee you and hear you sing.looking forward to see you every week,brother:D
elvingonglianjie:wellwell,from mushroom to durian.great transform,anyway.you've been a great friend,even though irritating now.
learning from me,help me do alot of things.maybe to an extend,seems like i making use of you.sorrybut i've never thoguht it that way or so.you're nice:D
eugenetohyingcong:my dearest brother,i love you like crazy!:DDDi will play with you aft exams,i love you,my coolshuai brother.dont go astray,cos me lvoe you.always special/loving in my eyes.thanks for spending those years with me.i love you,without you.things are jsut different.i aprreciate you,my awesoem brother.sorry,i bully you make you do things for me.at leats now,rarely.i will never forget the childhood memories with you:DDDyou rock and i love you alot&always.
fatinfahannah:you've been an awesome choir friend,love laughing with you.and disturb you and ferris wheel,seeing you and your blurness makes me smile,and your hotpink.loves<3
jasminechuajiayu:you're always so kind nice to me.haha;DDlaughing at my bhbness,singing with you,your voice is so beautiful.i love you manymany<3
joannehengzhien:you are one act cool person,hahha;DDjkjk,sittign near you is cool.seeing your-.- face when we go reatarded/spastic.didnt you got a reatrdedcrazy side of you,so kan bu chu.dotn cry becuase of results,we all workhard together do well for olevels alright?:Dlove yea
joellelynkaur:twofive is the best,talking to you about it was nice.i miss the laughter fun twofive had.thansk for helping me in maths,when we laugh together at shaojun's retardedness was fun.your roaring laughter is something i will never forget.in between,got abit of conflict,but gald now its okay.do well for your geography,always smile and dont so stress.and your number 5 sunshine pose i sso ever cool-.-hahha,dont so vulgar and want cry or vent anger can infront of me,laughing always is so scary.hahaha;DDjkjk,you'v ebeen a nicecoolspastic friend,i will remember your double eyebags,so special and original.love you always;D
joeelowsichan:i will rememebr you for your fringe,hahha;DDprettykid,your laughter are always roaring and so nolink.haha,loves
katherinekangmengyun:you also another one that change alot in terms of look.you art very nice,and you are a coolkid.i wont forget the memories we had one,laughingfunny.and getting-.- faces at your supernolink jokes.
even though,now not same clique or whatsoever,i'll still remember and treat you as friend:Dlooking at last year pics,your cool hair and angshaojun's neverending windows,brings endless smiles to me.you're always cool,and for the times.you're upset/pissed off,i'm sorry.it'd because i was too insensitive.i also wont forget you,kangmengyun lovelove<3
merritanmeiyan:my childhood bestfriend<3ilove you and shopping together,me lvoe you.i will miss you if you migrate to canada,i love you always,dearest friend<3
michelleangpeiwen:another pri school mate,its coolnice to seen you havent grow much=Xbut you're sitll cool.hahaa;DDhope things are fine now,but nexttime,if i do smth wrong or what.must tell me,thn i can change.last long with daryl:Dhahah,lovesloves.stay pretty.and your teeth are so ever-loving.
miho:your japanese is so absolute cool,teach me when you got time.love you,and you play pool super cool luh!love<3
nicholasangmoh:you very cool,be ncie to miho*winks.hahaha;DDDawesomekid.
nurulafiqah:another coolpretty babe in choir,nice to talk to and laugh with over fatin's blurness.you're always cool and choir with you is so absolutely fun.love<3
selwinpangbimbo:so sad,somepeople cant take exams.you're an awesoem person to irritate and suan.many things happen,but hope you will always smile.got problem can come to me,dont just shutup and dont say.msut alwaysalwyas smile,things will get better one.get well soon,i miss annoying you.and you're a nice person to talk toone,cool bimbo<3
tanjiaying:love you luh,shoppign with you alsway cool,annoying you till you cant take it.influencing you to suan people andcallign you short,you are really great,i love you and spendign time wit hyou is cool.talking to you.
viviantohhuimin:i love you<3you are always cute in my eyes:DDDDDand dotn sad the korean guy gone.
vivientan:even thoguh you very aunty.but you always so nice.irritating at times,but nice to talk to.dont grow so old luh and live in denial.
tanyeowsheng:you rock big time,very cool eh.known you for 3 years?i forgot,but you like so nicecool to talk to and fianlly your hair grow liao.and you'll alwyas somehow be liek a bigbrother to me.
terryng:you rock luh,always help me and encourage me,tell me i can do it.those encouragements were really awesome,because not once did you put me down.i love you alot<3
tanzhihao:you very cool,and if you girl sure very pretty one.eeylashes so long=Xbut talking suaning you always so fun.sister for life<33
xiekewei:call me skinny and skinny,so mean.but you'r ereally nice one:Dhahaha,stay cool dont act cool.
zhulijuan:known you for 3 years,was nice to highfive with you and play netball together.hahah;DDpwning you attimes is so fun,we might have fight,and may not even be in same clique.but i also will remember you,you've been a great friend,and i truly treat you as one.and dont hate you or dislike you at all.smile always,i also wont forget shaking hands in the homeecons room,you rock.knowing you was a cool thing,you form part of my wonderful memories in school.dont worry hair will grow one:]
lovelove<3
daddy:i know you work so superhard to provide for family,i loved you man.if you smoke less,i'll be so happy.i can ttell now you dont smoke infront of us.i knwo you love me alot,but paiseh to say one.i also sometimes,i love you alot.so happy you are my daddy:Di love you alotalotalotalot<3
mummy:last time always fight with you,now i so happy never so often.you treating me so nice now,even everyone says so.i love you alot,thanks for treating me so good,doting me.i sick bring me go see doctor.i love you always and always,my dearest mummy.
I<3everyone of you so very much,even if i never mentioned you.its cos i very lousy at remembering ppl names.you all made my life in a special way.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY VTHM<3
Friday, September 26, 2008
and aft exams:DDD
miss me
Monday, September 15, 2008
vanessa super cool uh,
her blonde hair is awesomely cool.
not to mention brother zhihao,
le tme bully him.
eheh,
i think i very BEN.
idk how fold heart:[
stupid xiekewei luh,you loser,
want me fold,thn dont bully me.
lame shit,
hahhahaa;DD
fianlly your eye bigbig sia,
say i cute!
right choice:D
bhb to the max.
okok nvm,
and my retardspastic ass,
thanks for making my day today.
really appreciate.
i miss those times man!:DDDD
those straightforaward stuffs,
laugh together
snapsnap,
hahaha,i wont reveal that photo.
ME LOVE YOU!<3333333
oh yah,lynkaur
mus treally thankyou luh,
teach me maths,
i know i very dumb one,
can vomit blood,
you becming a naggy teacher,
got potential.
hah,jkjk.
love you too,thankyou alot:D
and most imptli,
you,daddy.
i love you the most,
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
came across this:
if zhulijuan you happen to see this.
good for you..
very cute ehs,and qianda
and i saw your lj.
thanks,glad you like it
i also nvr not regarded you as NOT a friend
maybeperhaps
out on the surface
but that doesnt mean my heart cannot do otherwise.
hope you like/enjoy today.
seee you happy,i also happy:D
anyway,
if you not happy,
can also talk to me.
even though i highly doubt so.
but i do/did have my reasons,
for being like this/staying like this.
but me <3you still
this picture like so long liao
oh and look whos with the bangs now
:D hohohos, be happy
sorry never write anything for you.
or do any special things.
sorry,i very thoughtless.
hope you enjoy the day,
smile more,
cause you look awesome:]
i think i very mean tod,
sorrry.
happybirthday eugene,reena,reena's twin
mroemroe birthdays.
oh man,moneykiller luh.
exams are coming.
feelign the pressure like crazy.
andand!
today in class was way high to the max.
hahaha.lame stuffs.
and we freakign embarras ourself.
when michelle say eh.
we all run,realise not
everyone stare at us.
so weird,and paiseh.
on bus,also.
lynkaur crazy ass luh:D
angshaojun-highspastic bird
joellelynkaur-highlaughing bird
joanneheng-highcool bird
viviantoh-highcuteawesoem bird:DDDDDDDD
we are all birds.
ahahahah!:DDDD
lame,keeping mind off eams.
burning man!
and shaojun,be sure i'll try get you tht thing
you say
Sunday, September 7, 2008
ytd was a highhigh fun day at Kallang.
kept crazy.
and i paiseh-ed myself at fairprice:[
nehneh luh,
cause i carrying
the big bottles of oolong /peach/lemon tea/7up.
in my arms.
thn too big.
thn start gg drop.
thn unknowingly.
bend infront of everyone
in the centre.
and kneeel in the middle of place
everyone queuing.
ohmy,so paiseh.
tht the aunty keep stare like funny.
hmph!
suddenly,got this little tamil girl.
pass me a basket.
me:"its okay"
girl:"nvmnvm,take it"
huh,so nice eh.
purposely help me take.
how sweet can people get?even a stranger:D
singing session rock to max!
so sad uhs,
clement gg for NS.
dinner-ed at same dk what.
walk-ed under rain.
train-ed home.
slept at 5!thanks to somebody.
who wants to talk,
but keep dozing offf.
thn like only i talk to phone.
like weird,
FAT HIPPO!,
oh and i 'm sensitvie to hippo.
hahaha,so dont mention
i will go bizzare.
and ytd was hoorror,
i pin fringe go out whole day
nvr before,but cos
i late no time.
if i let down.
fringe sure BAOZHA
ILOVETHATFLOWER,
I GOT MANYMANY.
IINTENDTOGIVEPEOPLE.
I WILL MAKE THEM LOVE,CAUSE I LOVE.
hahaha;DDD
Saturday, September 6, 2008
upload more,when i get from vivien.
which is aloong time from now
heyyo!:DDD
my holidays hmwks are undone,
boohoo eh,
must chiongchiong.
and i still cant bear to eat
the stupid ritzcarlton mooncake:[
hahaha;DD
aunty bought for us at 10 bucks
for one so called"big" piece.
ohmy,
hahahaha:]
the thought of sch reopening.
mixed thoguhts.
EXCITED/SIAN!
exams are coming.
means mugging and stressing overload.
esp for last mins like me=X
gosh,
hey HAPPYkids out there,
want mug ask me alright?
cos airport is so gg to be my ideal place:DDD
its hard to come out from me,ya know.
slacker to the max.
oh,let me tell you benefits
if you study with me
1.you'll feel super clever
2.you'll feel the cleverest in the world,
even though i'll try to smash yourr ego like mad.
disadvantages:
1.i'll suan and bhb to the max.
2.i'll keep trying to find faults in your answers:]
hahaha;DD
aand i'll be quiet(maybe)
for the few times in my life.
and headign to cg at kallang.
boohoo so far eh.
and i missed the meeting=X
cause i overslept.:[
Friday, September 5, 2008
ohmy,and i found out.
selwin is that bimbotic.
to use pimple cream=X
hohos;DD
gayyyy to the max.
tod's outing was fun though.
WALL.E was fine.
not say veryvery nice to the max.
started not well.
cause SOMEBODY was late.
spoil my mood.
aft tht,
head-ed to princess kaur aka. miss act cute's hse
got brother to put present.
hahaha;DD
and i was so paiseh.
carrying the thing around ws okay!
everyone was like.
hahaha.
hope you liked it.
and i know its supersuper long+neat.
half of it is bullshit.
sorry,wasnt thinking well.
butbut,
the bhb one is real,
i was in my right mind.
hehehe,
and me love you<3
headed to ang's hse.
who ask her sick,lousy
oh my,
UNGLAM to the max.
but sexysexy,hahah
you owe me luh,LAONUREN!
and tell you secret:
you look even more LAO today=X
hahahahah;DDD
but i will always be young+cute.
hello,bhb is my hobby.
angshaojun and joellelyn also.
learn here and there.
so not my fault,
and was super tired.
walk so lnog.
angshaojun+joellelynkaur,
both of you better be thankful.
i already so nice send to your doorstep.
somemore i'm of royalblood:]
and i witness elvinong,
fall infront of me.
we both tripped.
but he fell and roll?
omt!so funny
thats for ganging up with brother,
to suan me
IMA HIGH/HAPPY KID,
LOVE ME<3
pleaseplease,
dont destroy the perfect/happy image
of you all luh.
i really want be happykid.
dont make me change.
stop lying to me,
i hate liars.
i hate you people screaming.
yahyah,ok everytime cos of us.
i try my best
to think of well of everybody.
but i also tired,
come home.
thn saysay.
worried,but i really need a break awhile.
i also dk how much to help you all.
the scar alrdy there.
you all prob continue arguing.
not much i can help.
only can say sorry.
tell me,i also dont think i can do anything.
since everyone insists they're right.
yah,who likes feeling bad.
but like tht how to survive.
just becos i cry,
and tell you everything.
doesnt mean you can use on me.
cos it jsut makes me feel very shit.
and wrong to trust you.
and i dontwant to be like this.
dont make me like this please.
ibegbegbegyou.
i want to be happy.
please
but i'm not a robot leh.
please spare some feelings for me.
"why like that also dk"
"even your sister the brain like that,also know how do,
why you cannot?"
i know you dont mean it.
i dont want to take it to heart.
its not very nice a feeling to feel.
i know i dumb,
but doesn tmean can insult me.
huh i dont understand you all?
only put show for ppl?!!!@!
i neverneverm
if i didnt you think i will care.
when i'm heartless,
i really am.
what you say,just made me feel so hurt.
why you so nice to me,
thn so mean
thn how,you want me act.
one moment,you like care for me
understand,i can trust.
next moment,not at all.
i feel lost,
i want to love all of you,
trying and i want.
I WANT TO SMILE&BEHAPPY!
shopping with mama&brother.
went wisma/orchard
so fun,fuunny:DDDDDDDDDD
so nice,its been long
since we done that.
even though i nvr spend much time
revising my hmwk.
but i'm glad i found out many things.
learnt so many things.
realised so many things.
changed so many things:]
so aft shopping.
head-ed to amk hub.
walkwalk talk.
thn bus-ed home with brother.
while mummy go work.
went home,
receive such "NEWS"
but its ok.
i spent a longlong time sorting my thoguhts.
eveyreverything.
WHEEE!
guess what,
IMA SUPER HAPPYKID TO THE MAX:DDD
i love all of you man!
hahaha;DD
gg to stick to you like crazy.
not on the surface
but on the inside.
i wont forsake you all one,
i wont break my promise:D
lovelovelove<3
my first 3 guinea pigs:ang,ong,pang.
hahhah,
i lvoe you all like mad,
and everyone:DDDD
i'm highhigh.
and ang thanks for letting me talk to you,
i feel alot better.
wheee,disturb you when you sick.
and your voice is like SHIT!=X
hohohos;DDD
pictures upload later.
movie with brother:DDDD
and i cant wait.
hope nth spoils.
i feel better letting everything out.
at least now they all understand.
i lvoe you papa/mama/brother.
papa,treat me superusper nice.
tell me its ok,
he felt guilty?
hohohos,i love you man.
i love you mama,
i love you brother,
i love you friends,
i love you classmates,
i love you strangers,
i love you everyone.anyone.
and I LOVE YOU,BESTDADDY
evne though you in heaven,
me love you like crazy.:DDD
i love loving people,
because i feel so overwhelmed by love.
hating people is so not fun/mahfan.
whoohoo,
MUCH LOVES TO YOU PEOPLE.
INEEDYOU/LOVEYOU.
more than life itself,
more and more each day,
more and more each day,
i need you
Thursday, September 4, 2008
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TERRY!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOELLELYN!
theres dinner later.
i know i kuku bird,idk how go=X
ytd,will be a day
i nvr forget.
clear a load of things.
until my eyes so freaking pain:[
idkidkwhat.
sorrry for not trusting you.
From now on:
IMA GONNA BE A HAPPYKID,
I WILL TRY
i miss the past loads
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
how foolish can i get.
well,i also dk who to trust.
but i have doubts about you now
dk luh,
bored.
so i jus t blog what i feel.
realised something.
i know why people who are not heartless cry.
because they have HEARTS.
HEARTS
tears is like part of the word hearts.
when you have a heart,
you cry.
because you feel.
people who are heartless.
dont have hearts.
rarely cries.
the word itself already warn you.
when you have a heart,
you cry.
and therefore,are stronger.
bottomline:almost everyone is selfish,
its rare to have one who sacrifices.
except for that man 2000 years ago.
i hope you dont regret
i feel lost now.
damndamn,
was helping brother name his pet
"scaredy"
hahaha:D
no mood do hmwk.
my eyes are bloody pain.
oh man,
all these meancruel ass.
great,
everyone is damn selfish.
damn,hurt ppl feelings.
haiyoh,this world weird luh.
come to think of it.
someone with a heart.
some who is heartless.
there isnt much of a diff.
both also hurt/cause same damage.
but person with heart can
be even more ruthless.
becos the heart is deceitful&sweetrevenge.
and hopefully things can get better.
cos if i can get a wish.
thats for cold wars to end.
and everyone happy.
impossible?
right now,yes.
AND YOU!YOU'RE JUST DOWNRIGHT MEAN:[
got heart so what,
yah a cruel,mean heart.
heartless people would even be better.
yes,i'm talking about you.
if you think i'm talking about you.
its your conscience.
if you did nth wrong,
why would you even suspect.
i talking about you.(seriously)
choosing that over this.
is it real/true/fake/nice/mean?
idk leh,seriously.
right now,i have got many things
to worry about
i knwo you damn cried
every night.
i udnerstand the hurt
because thats how i feel.
worst when noone udnerstands.
please dont treat me so codly.
i be good girl
i promise.
dont so icymean to me.
whatever it is,
i love the both of you.
i dw lose both.
is gonna spoil my tuesday.
it will be a goodday.
and i love you, daddy
alotalotalot.
me love you like crazy.
my talkingnaggysuaning buddy.
i will get you a cool present
becos you are cool
ps,can i get an early bday wish?
i have no idea on what to do.
there's tml
bday celebbration for terry.
idk what to buy also.
i really hope things will go
back to how we were.
i hate the coldness/hatred
between you all.
i know deep in your heart,
you love us alot.
but you just forcing yourself.
i also really dk what to do.
i see him,
he seem so remorseful.
but thats always what happen.
but things repeat.
and you just get even more upset.
idk,i'm not him.
i dont want to be dragged in.
but how not to.
i'm part of you all.
i also sicktired of all these things.
i'm also affected.
not only you all.
hearing/seeing what you all do.
is enough to make
me cry a fountain.
i think we are very cool,
we laugh alot together.
we suan each other.
nag at eachother.
but when things turns sour.
its the scariest,i ever seen.
everyone so hot-tempered.
alittle thing only,
blow our top.
i'm sorry i shout at you.
when you alrdy felt upset.
but i was also.
hes my brother also.
i wonder to myself.
what will happen when he goes ss.
the thought of it
already scares me so much.
i hate feeling pathetic/worried.
and knowing i cant do any shit about it.
cant we just go back?
where we celebrated bdays at airports.
so happily.
take pictures.
when we were all young.
and smiles were the only thing
that werecarried on our faces.
where we were just innocent.
at least let daddy have a good happy bday,
i dont mind if i have a sucky one.
i dont expect much either.
but just let him have a hppy one?
please God,i beg you.
if anyone that deserve.
its him,work so hard.
and dote on me so much.
speaking of that,
i miss the times i spend time with you all.
times when i was little.
and cuddle you.
times when i played video games with you.
when i feel scared.
run to your room and sleep.
things just changes damn fast.
please go back.
or was i the one who change?
seeing you slam the phone.
to the ground
i just so afraid.
idk,
i know you pissed
no matter if it was becos of me/him.
i hate it when you all fight.
becos i jsut feel guilty
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
what to say of you anymore.
do you know how hurt she is?
from young till now,
who take care of our
medical expenses?
whats the use of crying over
things that already happened?
got use?
you cry not because
you feel sad that you hurt them.
but because you afraid people
will scold/beat you.
why so selfish?
i admit i am but i trying hard to change.
but idk if its even right.
Do you know because of you,
all these things happened?
i know its seem so unfair.
but its true.
you know shes sick,
any heavy blows can
cause her heart to faint.
yet,you keep giving all these stuffs.
wake up please,
stop living in your own world.
you know how scary they go,
when they quarrel.
everything just comes out.
you never once think of
consequences.
only expect people to help
you clear the mess.
you must learn to be independent.
we cannot always be there for you.
just becuase you cry.
so what.
the world will not pity you.
so must learn to be strong,
people whos eem strogner are often labeleld
as criminals.
why so selfish.
all you people think is their stupid faults.
the pain/agony they caused you.
they scold you.
whatever they are wrong.
have you even tried stepping
in he rshoes.
the fact is she cares for you(alot)
but in the end,
she gets all the blame.
seriously,just becos she scold
she dontwant you go astray.
she get blamed.
you know hwo super hurtful it is?
no,becos you were
always the royalty.
its obvious they treat you nicer
than they did to me.
you dont appreciate.
you even grieve them more.
why are you trying to
break up my family.
whywhy.tell me.
sooner or later,
if it continues.
they will just leave.
and by that time
i will never ever forgive you.
whats a family without
a father/mother.
fily/mily?
why have you become so heartless.
why must learn from me.
if these things that happen
last year till now,
i was the one who did it.
i would have died of beating.
do you not realise
how well they treat you?
when they rant at each other,
you jsut stand there/cry.
i see,i listen in my room.
you think i dont get upset?
you think you
the only one who is hurt?
onyl scoldings,you deserved it.
you know how many times
yuo broke their hearts?
yeah,they dont say.
they even treat you better.
you dont know ppl will
worry for you.
you just do whatever
your shittydogidiotic friends
ask you do.
dont you have your own mind?
they ask you do what,
you do.
you dont know we will worry.
jsu tleave,without taking phone.
come home as you please.
how contact you?
how old are you,you can teven take gd care.
of yourself.
i ask you stuffs,
you rant at me.
say its not my business
at the rate things are crashing,
we will break apart.
do you even know/care
to understand?
how ppl want to do you good?
you dont appreciate.
jsut becos we dont show
doesn tmean we dont care.
she gets the blame.
becuase she cared and want see you happy.
how fair!
jsut becos noone understands
her methods
shes gets blacklisted/blamed.
they quarrel,for now
she hates him.
you happy?
why must drag me in?
you want "spice" up your life?
i dont,all i want is family.
you like lying,dont you.
i alrdy knew,you lying.
i even asked you thrice.
you denied.
we can save you twice/thrice
but not always.
this world is harsh/cruel.
you dont feel guilty.
even if you did awhile.
you smack us with even
mor ehorrible stuffs.
i also have my problems you know?
i have my damn problems.
people dont understand
what i doing/feel.
i'm the badguy.
blast those damn vulgars at me.
some hate me for reasosn i dontevenknow.
i didn try seem pathetic.
cos i hate to even feel pathetic.
yeah,i in the wrong.
idk luh.
i like it uh?
i try not to think,be happy
thn you give me problems.
at times,i really want tell you.
but you dont even seem to care about me.
even if they make up,
dont you know the scar remains?
when things happen again,
past gets racked up.
and the scar just deepeneds.
is tand inside my room,
i cry because i feel so upset.
liek what she say.
is this even a family?
seeing own members hurt each
other,
everyone gets hurt in some way.
l alrdy feel so damn horrible.
why must you do this?
why always seem like her fault?
jsut beocs you seem weaker.
she doesn even want your sympathy.
jsut your freaking love/care.
you think she at work nvr suffer?
why is it always about you?
you cause the fights/sadnes.
you do well,
they really happy.
but why msut disappoint them time&time
you nto dumb,
we all think well of you.
thn you think our hearts plastic.
keep taking knife and pierce.
funfair uh?
we all love you,
you spent themost time with me.
i spent my childhood with you.
i do things which i feel
is best/safe for you.
you scoldme
and get so pissed off at me.
why must i show all your qi?
i cared for you,
you got care for me?
when i'm down,
i reall wish for you to know/be there.
cos we're living together.
its jsut driving to be
a icy/heartless person.
at least,it feels less painful.
and whne i change,
hate me like mad,say i change.
dont care you
i know you also lonely,
now i go hoem early.
so i cna spend time with you.
at leats pei you,
so you not alone.
and do silly weird stuffs.
why didnt you eve rsee my effort?
i give time,
i did gave up things for you,
did you?
i try my best to care for you,
show love.
cos i hope you'll be moved/change.
i hate seeing you hurt them,
or hurt yourself.
becuase it makes me cry
and my heart aches.
i love allof you damn alot.
becos i spent my growing years with you all.
i dont tell anyone about you.
i keep in m yheart.
becos i wouldnt want my sister
doing it also.
now the living room just lifeless/quiet.
and its not the first time.
but cant it just be the last time?
please.
i really dk what to do
how to handle.
just know that,
i love/miss you all alot,family.
i'll be fine
cos tml gona be a better day
hear him sing,
made me get goosebumps.
and i almost teared.
so cool
so now i'm bored.
kinda siann.
to go out shop later.
come to think of it.
i'm not somebody who
makes good use of holidays.
boohoo.
anyway,waited 2 long hours.
for daddy to finish.
omt!can die.
i so need to peee lah.
nth to do,play psp.drinkdrinkdrink.
thn of course want pee right.
wah best,not toilet!
so to keep myself from wanting to pee,
i keeep thinkingthinking.
about many stuffs that happened.
not very happy,
but hello!
better than peeing in your pants.
After 2 looong hours,
i was like eh faster go home.
and dad was damn smart.
you want go toilet right?
and he keeps telling me to cut my hair short.
cos he dont like it.
and he say give me 300 bucks.
last call.
i was like wth!
my hair really that shit meh.
daddy:"you cut this,cut that,
sure got some ppl say nice,others not."
me:"okay,true"
daddy:"hello!who gets their haircut
and gets paid.300 leh,you consider lah hor!"
hes like one funny ass.
thn go say he say first,
nobody dare say second=.=
major bhb:D
i so want to go catch a movie man.
borred.
gg out soon (iguess)
holidays are making me grow fat!
just now
had bigbowl of noodles and porridge.
thn the ahma opp. was like
"wl,scary bodoh"
school is starting soon.
exams are coming.
and i'm still wasting time.
cool or what.
being a happy person,
is being someone who dont think.
heading for breakfast
with papa.
didnt want go.
but he tempted me with food.
obviously would work.
might be shopping,
gg visit grandmama at jurong.
thn go catch movie/play
at jurong centre there?:D
what do you expect me to do?
i just dont want think
about anything
while i can
Monday, September 1, 2008
hope you felt better.
yeah,you're suffering.
because of me.
can scold/rant at me or whatever.
because i know its my fault.
tod had any lessons.
got feeling was physics.
until liwei told me.
screw it.
anyway,
gave outing a miss.
ecp so hot,
kays,i'm jsut lazy.
not much of a mood either.
wokeup,tv.
thats how i slack i am.
must studystudy
chocolates,cheer people up:DD
how to regain confidence?