Friday, June 4, 2010
i need a break.
since i suppose this blog is seemingly dead
and no one visits here.
ohwells,
i really need a break now
why is it so that a june holiday isnt like a june holiday anymore
i'm so tired
i need lots of catching up to do
training is killing me
1.3.5 every week.
i need a breakaway
sometimes i'd wished there's a secret doorway
i can enter
and be away from all this annoying stuffs.
oh wait
there's the secretplace
since i've decided to enter this pre-u journey
why is it so
i always seem like i'm losing my grip
it is tough
i know somehow it does takes a toil on her as well
because i sleep late
she worries and all
dear God,
what am i to do..
i really feel hopeless and all
i dont wish to go tuition anymore and face tht tuition tcher
yeah,i failed math again
boohoo
dear hs,i really need you.
i'm so tired.
i neeed you to help me
cause if you dont,i really dont know what to do
rightnow,i really feel so lost.
who should i turn to?
i feel like i need to vomit out all my thoughts and all
but thn i will prob end up in a whirlpool of tears or smth
i thought holidays = getting my life back
but no..
i have so many things
i should stop ranting right?
in any case,dear father
i know you hear me,i choose to believe you will answer.
i know i can trust in you.
last night's dream was awesome
seeing myself beign so hungry and desperate for revival
even though it was a dream..
i felt such desperation
almsot seemingly
i was groaning in my spirit
you must not pass singapore by
while other nations experience revival
there's such a longing for me to see you move here
i will never forget that feeling
i know you are doing something
this might be the valley of shadow of death for me
a tough season,i know you have so much for me
and what you've called me to
it's a beautiful gift to be sensitive to you
this journey,i'm determined to walk it with you
for i know,on my own i fail.
its really hard..
and i just realised
what's results?
what's fame?
what's fun?
what's everything?
without you
i've been through it
and i know how empty,and dull
how miserable life is w/out you
i cant even stand a moment knowing i'm further away from you
not because you left
but because i did
its such a horrible experience
i'd never want to leave you
dear jesus,make me a child tht will cling onto you no matter what.
i have so much more to say
but i shall leave it to later..
i feel so much better now,
typing out everything
i'm so excited for revival
but please start with me,i need one personal revival/breakthrough now
desperately,
i really do..
(12:44 PM)